I’m not even entirely sure where to start with this one. I know we’ve lambasted some ads from the motorcycle industry for being poorly executed, preaching the wrong message, or simply teetering on on the realm of Oedipus Rex, but this ad spot from Nissan takes the cake as the worst advertisement ever to involve a motorcycle. I’m honestly at a loss for words, so I’ll just say that I’ve always thought that the Nissan Juke was the ugly still-born bastard love child between a platypus and a tarnished sack of candied apples (I hear it’s nicer from the inside, where you can’t see how awkward of an automobile it is). I’d rather drive a Pontiac Aztec.

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Bikes

Spending some time at Borgo Panigale factory during the San Marino GP race week, Ducati Corse rider Nicky Hayden couldn’t help but tease the upcoming 2012 Ducati Streetfighter 848 that was “spied” testing last month. With this photo and tweet, Hayden affirms the news we broke in July, and with the message “Coming soon… #ducati #droppingonmonday” we can infer that Ducati will be taking the wraps off the Streetfighter 848 on Monday next week.

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In what we’re sure will re-ignite the ongoing car vs. bike debate, Bridgestone test rider Tim Röthig set out with a 2011 Kawasaki ZX-10R, a set of of Battalax R10 race tires, and a handful of blitzkrieg riding moves to race against the clock on the German course. With an entirely respectable 7min 50sec lap time, Röthig lapped the 12.8 mile track just over half a minute off the carbon-chassised LFA’s time. Though perhaps not the King of the Nordschleife, with that run Röthig still manages to embarrass a number of drool-worthy cars we’d like to have in our fantasy garage.

Bikes

Mercedes-Benz and Ducati continue to circle each other, as the two iconic brands hammer out the details of how an Italian motorcycle company would fit inside a German automobile manufacturer. While the bean-counters and pencil-pushers get that shotgun marriage’s pre-nup arranged, we get to see interesting co-branding “partnerships” like this: the Ducati Diavel AMG Special Edition. While we’ve seen plenty of AMG-tuned cars in Ducati adverts, events, and press materials, this is the first time the sacred three-letter name has graced the haul of one of Bologna’s steads.